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We want to know: What’s your favorite data joke?

Alteryx Alumni (Retired)


GOT THOUGHTS.pngFor this week’s Thursday Thought we’re keeping things simple. VERY simple… but more importantly fun!



What’s your favorite data joke?

Alteryx Alumni (Retired)

paranormal distribution.png

Former Alteryx, Inc. Support Engineer, Community Data Architect, Data Scientist then Data Engineer
20 - Arcturus
20 - Arcturus

Here are a few that might create a chuckle:


- There are two kinds of data scientists:  1) Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.

- In data science, 80 percent of time spent is preparing data, 20 percent of time is spent complaining about the need to prepare data.

- There are 10 kinds of people in this world, those who understand binary and those who don't.

- Your mama is so mean, she has no standard deviation.

- A physicist, a mathematician, and a statistician go hunting.  They spot a deer and take aim.  The physicists shoots first and misses 10 meters to the right.  The mathematician shoots next and misses 10 meters to the left.  The statistician then throws down his gun and proclaims, "we got it!"


I enjoyed the binary and mean (that one was at inspire16) for a long time.  The others were in a blog post that I found.  There are plenty of Dilbert cartoons to choose from.  Of course, if you're a star trek fan there are even more data jokes to choose from.


Happy IPO day!



Alteryx ACE & Top Community Contributor

Chaos reigns within. Repent, reflect and restart. Order shall return.
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Alteryx Alumni (Retired)

Thanks for sharing @MattD and MarqueeCrew!  Since @MarqueeCrew opened the door to Star Trek jokes... I figured I'd share one that made me laugh.









Sophia Fraticelli
Senior Solutions Architect
Alteryx, Inc.
6 - Meteoroid

Found this shirt recently and loved it:


17 - Castor
17 - Castor

one for the spatial analytics folk among us....

Well, I would walk 500 miles, and I would walk 500 more...Well, I would walk 500 miles, and I would walk 500 more...

17 - Castor
17 - Castor

and one for all the Bill Whithers fans out there....




I know the title is data jokes, but I can't believe there aren't any XKCD comics on here.

Stephen Ruhl
Principal Customer Support Engineer

12 - Quasar
12 - Quasar

-If at first you don’t succeed; call it version 1.0.


-A company manager is flying across the desert in a hot air balloon when he realizes he is lost. He calls down to a man riding a camel below him and asks where he is.
The man replies, “You’re 42 degrees and 12 minutes, 21.2 seconds north, 122 degrees, 10 minutes west, 212 meters above sea level, heading due east by north east.”
“Thanks,” replies the balloonist. “By the way, are you a data analyst?”
“Yes,” replies the man, “how did you know?”
“Everything you told me was totally accurate, you gave me way more information than I needed and I still have no idea what I need to do.”
“I’m sorry,” replied the camel-riding analyst. “By the way, are you a company manager?”
“Yes,” said the balloonist, “how did you know?”
“Well,” replied the analyst, “You’ve got no idea where you are, no idea what direction you’re heading in, you got yourself into this fix by blowing a load of hot air, and now you expect me to get you out of it.”


I almost feel like these happen at least once a week. Both were taken from online.